It is a woman's privilege to experience the pregnancy and motherhood. So I boldly went where no man has gone before.
I believe that you are controlled by the baby inside when you are pregnant because I could not help but eating so much ice cream like I never had in my life. I would not pretend that I was a small eater, but the appetite during the late quarter of pregnancy was something beyond my control. The baby turned out to love ice cream and had a very good appetite from the day-one.
We named our daughter Sarah. I was baptised in the year 2001 by the international church of Kuala Lumpur, St.Andrews Presbyterian Church. I was hoping she could have a name from the bible which does not sound awkward in Japanese. Also my husband and I wanted our daughter to be a truly global person when she grows up and wanted give her a name which is familiar to people in many countries and cultures.
In fact, we later found out that the name Sarah existed in the Muslim culture and other Asian countries like India and Thailand not only US and UK. I want Sarah to be a boarder less and open-minded adult one day.
I went to the hospital on 6 November 2003 as the doctor advised me to go for c-section since the baby was in the breech position and it was my first delivery. My husband took a day-off to be with me in the operation room.
The anesthetic was partial so that I would be fully aware when the baby was out. It felt funny that you are awake when your tummy is being opened. But the doctors in Pantai Hospital were excellent and everything went smoothly. My husband had to suffer from more scary scenes sitting next me where he could see exact spot where the baby came out!
Sarah was 3,800g and completely healthy. When I held her for the first time in my arms, I thought I came out as a baby myself...she looked very much like me. She even had the same dimple at the same spot on cheek. It was such a sacred moment and my husband and I were filled with joy and love.
But it was a beginning of many sleepless nights and challenges. She happened to be a baby who requires a lot of attention all the time, and I was committed to give her a full breast-feeding which means no supplement milk or water for the first 6 months and continue it until the baby is 2 years old.
During the mother's class provided by the hospital when I was 8 months pregnant, the doctors emphasised the importance of the breast-feeding and I was completely convinced with the scientific facts. So I decided to make it the first gift to the baby.
Really...it must be difficult for those have no kids to imagine, but it WAS a real challenge. If it is a full breast-feeding, you can't ask someone to feed the baby on behalf. Theoretically you could extract the mother's milk and feed the baby from the bottle, but Sarah REFUSED to be fed by the bottle.
I thought all the babies would love the bottles...don't they love it on TV and movies?
Each baby is unique and different. Sarah happens to be the baby who does not WANT to be fed by the bottle. Even if I was out for an hour or so from home, she never ever allowed anyone to feed her. No matter how hungry she was, she waited for me to come back to feed her from the real thing. She was stubborn little baby and determined what she wanted or not.
So, like every other mother on earth, (except for those who are fortunate to have much easier handling babies), I took this new assignment seriously and dedicate all my waking time. It really was 24/7 work. No weekends or public holidays, whether you are sick or not, 3am in the morning or 4pm, the baby needs you.
I was fortunate that I lived in Malaysia. I hired a part-time maid who helped my with the home chores and changing diapers. Only a couples of hours for twice a week, but it made a huge difference. I don't know how to go through that in Japan or elsewhere you can't find such assistance.
No matter how hard this new job was (with no salary), I felt there was no other work on earth which could be more rewarding. The happiness filled my heart as I looked at Sarah's face when she was sound asleep. I thanked God so many times for this precious gift and made a pledge that I would provide her everything she needs until she is fully grown up and ready to stand on her own. I would never let her suffer for not having enough fund for education.
With a handful of friends who became mothers around same time, I was happy being a full-time mother. Not working disturbed me a bit, but I DID have an important job to raise Sarah, so I had no nervous breakdown this time. In fact, I was really busy every day as much as I was working full-time especially the first year of Sarah's life.
The peaceful family life was interrupted when I received a phone call from a consulting company where one of my previous business contact joined and became a country manager. It was late 2004. I was asked if I could come back to work, this time as a SAP consultant. They were looking for a Japanese-speaking consultant but there was no such resource in Malaysia, and they promised to send me for the full training course to obtain the certification in Finance module. He remembered that I had CPIM and SAP implementation experience. No other Japanese person had either in Kuala Lumpur.
During my college time, I did a research on the effect of working mother on children. In early 1990, it was suggested that mother should spend more time with a child until he/she becomes 3 years old. So I intended to go back to work after Sarah became 3 years old, but I doubted if the similar opportunity could be available two years later.
My husband and I had a serious discussion. Sarah was only 13 months and my husband wanted me to be a full-time mother for a few more years.
But I felt strongly moved by this opportunity and I could not let it go.
So I went to the interview to the consulting firm called Diagonal Consulting (now changed the company name to Morse Consulting) located on the 63rd floor of the Twin Tower in Kuala Lumpur City Centre. It was a UK based firm and had several overseas branches. Immediately after the interview, I was offered a position and a confirmation letter. Everything went so quickly as if it was all planned along.
Now my husband and I agreed that I go back to work and send Sarah to nursery full time. I found a good local nursery with many foreign kids which also provided transportation from/to the nursery everyday. The new life as a working mother started in April 2005.
Thursday, 9 October 2008
Wednesday, 8 October 2008
System Integrator: Bar Code Systems and ERP
So now I was married and moved in to a condominium in Bangsar, Kuala Lumpur.
It was the year 2000 when I could not stand staying home and my friend introduced me his friend's company called Data Collection Systems, which was a Japanese own system integrator specialising in bar code systems.
For a hotelier, it was a quite change. Fortunately I had many friends from NTT (Japan equivalent of AT&T) and I had personal interest in IT while I was in the hotel industry. Still there were a lot to learn.
It was the first time in my life I had Saturday and Sunday off and Christmas & New Year holiday. I have been working in the service industry since high school, so that I never really had proper Christmas or New Year holiday when the business is the most active.
The managing director was the only Japanese person in the company and he asked me to sell both bar code systems and ERP projects. The actual implementation would be done by the partner company called Magnus Consulting from Holland which had a branch office in Kuala Lumpur. As Magnus was a typical SAP house, I started to learn about SAP and worked with various consultants from Magnus.
Designing and selling bar code systems was quite fun too. I learned a lot about the manufacturing companies' operations: the clients were mostly the major Japanese manufacturers and logistics companies like Canon, Denso, Nippon Express, Shin-Etsu, etc. I travelled all over Malaysia to visit the clients.
I managed to close a SAP project with one of the major Japanese logistic company, and I experienced the full cycle of the implementation as a member of steering committee. And I realised that I want to do the project myself as a consultant.
One of my friends at Magnus suggested that I work on CPIM (Certified in Production and Inventory Management) from US if I wanted to pursue an ERP consultant career. There was a small business school in Kuala Lumpur offering a CPIM course on weekends and the exams could be taken locally. So I enrolled to the program and studied Supply Chain Management.
It took me two years to pass the four exams to obtain CPIM. I was happy for the result but not very happy at work. There were not much business or new project by the beginning of 2003 and the work became a routine and boring. Then I decided it was a good time to have a baby before I was too old.
Taking 6 months to conceive, I got pregnant and left the company in mid 2003. The new challenge awaited me: A baby and motherhood.
It was the year 2000 when I could not stand staying home and my friend introduced me his friend's company called Data Collection Systems, which was a Japanese own system integrator specialising in bar code systems.
For a hotelier, it was a quite change. Fortunately I had many friends from NTT (Japan equivalent of AT&T) and I had personal interest in IT while I was in the hotel industry. Still there were a lot to learn.
It was the first time in my life I had Saturday and Sunday off and Christmas & New Year holiday. I have been working in the service industry since high school, so that I never really had proper Christmas or New Year holiday when the business is the most active.
The managing director was the only Japanese person in the company and he asked me to sell both bar code systems and ERP projects. The actual implementation would be done by the partner company called Magnus Consulting from Holland which had a branch office in Kuala Lumpur. As Magnus was a typical SAP house, I started to learn about SAP and worked with various consultants from Magnus.
Designing and selling bar code systems was quite fun too. I learned a lot about the manufacturing companies' operations: the clients were mostly the major Japanese manufacturers and logistics companies like Canon, Denso, Nippon Express, Shin-Etsu, etc. I travelled all over Malaysia to visit the clients.
I managed to close a SAP project with one of the major Japanese logistic company, and I experienced the full cycle of the implementation as a member of steering committee. And I realised that I want to do the project myself as a consultant.
One of my friends at Magnus suggested that I work on CPIM (Certified in Production and Inventory Management) from US if I wanted to pursue an ERP consultant career. There was a small business school in Kuala Lumpur offering a CPIM course on weekends and the exams could be taken locally. So I enrolled to the program and studied Supply Chain Management.
It took me two years to pass the four exams to obtain CPIM. I was happy for the result but not very happy at work. There were not much business or new project by the beginning of 2003 and the work became a routine and boring. Then I decided it was a good time to have a baby before I was too old.
Taking 6 months to conceive, I got pregnant and left the company in mid 2003. The new challenge awaited me: A baby and motherhood.
Thursday, 2 October 2008
New Property, New Encounter
Concorde Hotel built a new hotel in Shah Alam, 25km west from Kuala Lumpur.
As the new General Manager for Shah Alam was the Resident Manager of Concorde Hotel Kuala Lumpur who interviewed me in the first place, I was asked to look after the both properties as Associate Director of Sales.
Shah Alam is a industrial suburb where there were many Japanese manufacturing companies operated. This new hotel with 380 rooms had to cultivate new clients with strong Japanese business base.
I moved my hotel room from Kuala Lumpur to this Shah Alam property and started work with those manufacturers.
One day, I had a food poisoning from tuna sandwich and stayed in the hospital for 2 days. When I was discharged, I was still weak and sick, but I dropped in the office to see how much work has been compiled in the past few days.
Then I received a phone call from Matsushita Electric (probably their bland "Panasonic" is more popular and they just changed the company name to Panasonic two days ago worldwide). They were my biggest target as they had a large number of engineers travel from Japan and each stayed for several months. They could be the biggest corporate account in Shah Alam.
The lady asked me to come to office today, so I grabbed the chance although I was still sick and on medical leave. It was a never-to-miss business opportunity.
As I arrived their massive office, the Chinese lady who was arranging a hotel for their visitors explained their requirements and negotiated on the price. I promised to come back to her the next day, and she said she wanted to introduce her boss to me.
I was bloody sick but happy to meet her boss. His name was Yasushi and quite a young looking manager in mid-thirties. I thanked him for the opportunity and said that the hotel could start a good relationship with Matsushita Electric.
The General Manager of Concorde Shah Alam was happy to have an opportunity to move all the long-term guests from the other hotel, and agreed with the requests from the client and published the special rate for them. I invited the client's general manager and managing director to the dinner in our hotel and had a long talk to start a good and mutual relationship.
The flow of guests started to come in to the new and quiet hotel.
I greeted many guest upon check-in, and made sure they were happy staying with us. The Japanese guest service officers were hired to attend them on day-to-day basis.
I worked with Yasushi and his bosses closely and received many phone calls from him. It was so natural and business-like, it took me a long time to realise he had personal interest in me. I did not like to get involved with clients personally, but when things happen, they do if you like it or not.
Yasushi happens to be my husband now, but until we got married in 2000, there was a long way to go. The first thing we did after we engaged was to inform the managing director of Matsushita Electic who congratulated us happily. If he was a typical, old-fashioned man, we would have had a very difficult time. But fortunately he was open-minded gentleman who was understanding and supportive to us. He went back to Japan soon after we disclosed our marriage plan and could not attend our wedding.
I left the hotel industry at the end of 1999 as I thought my working life in the hotel could easily destroy the new marriage life. I worked too long hours and weekends and public holidays. Even if I moved out from the hotel, it is not easy to change the working style and people's expectation.
The first couple of months I left the hotel, I tried to do nothing. I sort of trying to see if I could be a full-time housewife.
Then I realised I couldn't. I rather had a nervous break-down and started having funny physical problems like body rushes and non-stop coughing.
I wasn't fit to be a housewife. It was so very obvious.
The nervous break-down was not only due to not working, but also the toughest decision I just had to make. I was going out with a different Japanese man for the past three years who did not seem to want to marry me but changed his mind to marry me after I met Yasushi. I cared for him deeply so it was a very painful decision not to marry him. The final decision was made when I thought he would not have asked me to marry him if Yasushi never came between us. I did not want to use Yasushi to change his mind and throw him away after he did. Though I loved the other guy, it just did not seem the right decision. Letting him go was a tremendous stress as well, but I recovered from all the funny physical symptoms after I went back to work, so "not working" must have been the biggest stress at that time.
Yasushi and I cerebrated the new year of 2000 at our friend's condo in the centre of Kuala Lumpur. The new millennium was around the corner.
As the new General Manager for Shah Alam was the Resident Manager of Concorde Hotel Kuala Lumpur who interviewed me in the first place, I was asked to look after the both properties as Associate Director of Sales.
Shah Alam is a industrial suburb where there were many Japanese manufacturing companies operated. This new hotel with 380 rooms had to cultivate new clients with strong Japanese business base.
I moved my hotel room from Kuala Lumpur to this Shah Alam property and started work with those manufacturers.
One day, I had a food poisoning from tuna sandwich and stayed in the hospital for 2 days. When I was discharged, I was still weak and sick, but I dropped in the office to see how much work has been compiled in the past few days.
Then I received a phone call from Matsushita Electric (probably their bland "Panasonic" is more popular and they just changed the company name to Panasonic two days ago worldwide). They were my biggest target as they had a large number of engineers travel from Japan and each stayed for several months. They could be the biggest corporate account in Shah Alam.
The lady asked me to come to office today, so I grabbed the chance although I was still sick and on medical leave. It was a never-to-miss business opportunity.
As I arrived their massive office, the Chinese lady who was arranging a hotel for their visitors explained their requirements and negotiated on the price. I promised to come back to her the next day, and she said she wanted to introduce her boss to me.
I was bloody sick but happy to meet her boss. His name was Yasushi and quite a young looking manager in mid-thirties. I thanked him for the opportunity and said that the hotel could start a good relationship with Matsushita Electric.
The General Manager of Concorde Shah Alam was happy to have an opportunity to move all the long-term guests from the other hotel, and agreed with the requests from the client and published the special rate for them. I invited the client's general manager and managing director to the dinner in our hotel and had a long talk to start a good and mutual relationship.
The flow of guests started to come in to the new and quiet hotel.
I greeted many guest upon check-in, and made sure they were happy staying with us. The Japanese guest service officers were hired to attend them on day-to-day basis.
I worked with Yasushi and his bosses closely and received many phone calls from him. It was so natural and business-like, it took me a long time to realise he had personal interest in me. I did not like to get involved with clients personally, but when things happen, they do if you like it or not.
Yasushi happens to be my husband now, but until we got married in 2000, there was a long way to go. The first thing we did after we engaged was to inform the managing director of Matsushita Electic who congratulated us happily. If he was a typical, old-fashioned man, we would have had a very difficult time. But fortunately he was open-minded gentleman who was understanding and supportive to us. He went back to Japan soon after we disclosed our marriage plan and could not attend our wedding.
I left the hotel industry at the end of 1999 as I thought my working life in the hotel could easily destroy the new marriage life. I worked too long hours and weekends and public holidays. Even if I moved out from the hotel, it is not easy to change the working style and people's expectation.
The first couple of months I left the hotel, I tried to do nothing. I sort of trying to see if I could be a full-time housewife.
Then I realised I couldn't. I rather had a nervous break-down and started having funny physical problems like body rushes and non-stop coughing.
I wasn't fit to be a housewife. It was so very obvious.
The nervous break-down was not only due to not working, but also the toughest decision I just had to make. I was going out with a different Japanese man for the past three years who did not seem to want to marry me but changed his mind to marry me after I met Yasushi. I cared for him deeply so it was a very painful decision not to marry him. The final decision was made when I thought he would not have asked me to marry him if Yasushi never came between us. I did not want to use Yasushi to change his mind and throw him away after he did. Though I loved the other guy, it just did not seem the right decision. Letting him go was a tremendous stress as well, but I recovered from all the funny physical symptoms after I went back to work, so "not working" must have been the biggest stress at that time.
Yasushi and I cerebrated the new year of 2000 at our friend's condo in the centre of Kuala Lumpur. The new millennium was around the corner.
Thursday, 25 September 2008
1997: The Tragic Year
Besides my full-time sales manager work, I was also doing the translating work using a few hours before bed. One of the Malaysian newspaper had a web and wanted their top news to be translated in a few languages, and Japanese was one of them.
Of course I couldn't do it every night, so that I did this secret part-time job with another Japanese lady who was a full-time translator.
One night, I received the news article from the newspaper company by fax for the following morning top news.
It said Princess Diana died in the car crush.
I could not believe it as the news did not appear on TV or newspaper yet (of course it was going to be the following morning top news). I was hoping it was some kind of mistake, but it was true.
I also remember that I translated the currency crush news.
All Asian currencies crushed in July 1997, which put me in despair as all my life saving was in Malaysian Ringgit.
The Malaysian currency had been consistent with US dollars at 2.5 for all these years, but it fell up to 4.3 in 1997.
Besides sending money to my mother, I was saving from the translation work hoping to save enough to go back to the university in US one day. It was only two more years to finish off BA, and I intended to continue in the graduate school with scholarship.
But my savings worth 40% less now, and I did not know how long more it would take to save at least USD20,000 to apply the visa.
Following the currency market, the stock markets in Asia were hit by serious recessions. The hotel business was harshly hit as people cancelled the business trip and less Asians travelled for sightseeing that year and 1998.
No matter how many offices I visited every day, my clients could do nothing as people back in Japan had no reason to fly to Kuala Lumpur when the business deals were not there.
The sales department is the first one to be blamed for not filling up the hotel with customers. We all worked hard, but simply the business was not there.
The market situation did not recover much in 1998. It had to wait for the year 1999 to see the customers back in the hotels.
Several hotels approached me and offered senior positions, but I knew I would not be able to bring in the result in that market condition, so I kept turning down the job offers.
I simply stayed there and endured the pain of recession doing everything possible.
It was bitter, but meaningful lesson. The general manager was keeping his head up and tried everything. I admired his will power and optimistic behavior. No matter how he was worried and scared in reality, he never showed that to his staff. Instead, he came out of many interesting ideas to keep the business going.
The sad, busy years had passed slowly. It seemed to me the year 1997 and 1998 would last forever, but fortunately, they didn't.
Of course I couldn't do it every night, so that I did this secret part-time job with another Japanese lady who was a full-time translator.
One night, I received the news article from the newspaper company by fax for the following morning top news.
It said Princess Diana died in the car crush.
I could not believe it as the news did not appear on TV or newspaper yet (of course it was going to be the following morning top news). I was hoping it was some kind of mistake, but it was true.
I also remember that I translated the currency crush news.
All Asian currencies crushed in July 1997, which put me in despair as all my life saving was in Malaysian Ringgit.
The Malaysian currency had been consistent with US dollars at 2.5 for all these years, but it fell up to 4.3 in 1997.
Besides sending money to my mother, I was saving from the translation work hoping to save enough to go back to the university in US one day. It was only two more years to finish off BA, and I intended to continue in the graduate school with scholarship.
But my savings worth 40% less now, and I did not know how long more it would take to save at least USD20,000 to apply the visa.
Following the currency market, the stock markets in Asia were hit by serious recessions. The hotel business was harshly hit as people cancelled the business trip and less Asians travelled for sightseeing that year and 1998.
No matter how many offices I visited every day, my clients could do nothing as people back in Japan had no reason to fly to Kuala Lumpur when the business deals were not there.
The sales department is the first one to be blamed for not filling up the hotel with customers. We all worked hard, but simply the business was not there.
The market situation did not recover much in 1998. It had to wait for the year 1999 to see the customers back in the hotels.
Several hotels approached me and offered senior positions, but I knew I would not be able to bring in the result in that market condition, so I kept turning down the job offers.
I simply stayed there and endured the pain of recession doing everything possible.
It was bitter, but meaningful lesson. The general manager was keeping his head up and tried everything. I admired his will power and optimistic behavior. No matter how he was worried and scared in reality, he never showed that to his staff. Instead, he came out of many interesting ideas to keep the business going.
The sad, busy years had passed slowly. It seemed to me the year 1997 and 1998 would last forever, but fortunately, they didn't.
Thursday, 26 June 2008
New Life In Concorde
There was another 4-star hotel right in front of Shangri-la Hotel.
It was called Concorde Hotel (not the same group as the Concord in France) which was owned by a Singapore public listed company.
An experienced female Japanese sales manager was running the business there, but she wanted to leave the hotel industry and join one of the Japanese corporate company in KL. So I received the first offer from another company if I wanted to take over her position.
The offer was attractive. In Shangri-la, I was earning not so much different from a local sales executive would earn, but Concorde offered to treat me as an expatriate. So the net income was nearly double, the tax was paid by the hotel, and most of all they offered the accommodation in the hotel with full meals and room service facilities.
Since I was not happy continuing the relationship with the boyfriend at that time, it looked such a promising new life moving out from the shared apartment with him.
So I accepted the offer and broke up with the boyfriend from the US. I met both the Japanese Director of Sales and the resident manager Mr Lau, and the both looked very understanding bosses. Now I was not a sales executive, but became a sales manager.
After finishing a major event for Fuji Xerox, I moved to Concorde Hotel, both the office and private room. I sent the letter to all the clients that now I work for Concorde Hotel. Everything looked perfect.
But, there was a new challenge of life waiting for me there.
The immediate boss was not the ones I met before. It was a mid-aged Chinese lady who was the Director of Sales & Marketing, and she was not happy to have a 24-year-old Japanese sales manager from Shangri-la Hotel, the 5 star in front of her.
Even until today, she has been the most difficult boss and least logical. For example, there was a meeting briefing at 8:45am and I came in to the office before 8:30am, but she was not happy. According to her, since I live in the hotel itself, I should come in much earlier than anyone else.
Her favorite phrase was "Yukiko, I am so disappointed." And that was used for most of the staff in the sales department very often. She was constantly disappointed and very hard to please her no matter what we did.
In one case, there was an in-house Japanese young female guest who was approached by a waiter in the hotel's coffee shop, and she checked out as she was scared when the waiter came to her room one night.
The lady boss said, "Yukiko, that is your fault." I could not believe my ears. What did I do?
She said, "Because you did not greet her and meet her upon check-in and give her your business card to contact for any inconvenience, she checked out without telling us what happened. We could have done something to make up with her if you did your job."
She was like that to almost everyone in the office, and many staff left the hotel because of her. I was resented from time to time, but I learned to live with it after a while because the sales team was quite united and we had buddies to complain about her if you can't stand.
Also, the bosses above her were excellent. Both the resident manager and the general manager, Mr Lee from Singapore, were aware of what was happening and always encouraged and supported me.
When the lady boss was reluctant to confirm my employment after the probation, it was Mr Lee who did so. He was very sharp and talkative man with a lot of charms, and very Singaporean.
In Concorde Hotel, there were less VIPs since it was not the 5 star hotel. But we had many guests from Japanese manufacturing companies like Hitachi, Matsushita, and Toshiba as well as many long term guests.
1996 was such a glorious year for my career as a sales manager. The total sales under my accounts was almost RM6Million, and Mr Lee referred me to others saying, "You know, she is my 6 Million woman from the Japanese sector." My business trips to all over Malaysia and Singapore did pay off that year.
It was called Concorde Hotel (not the same group as the Concord in France) which was owned by a Singapore public listed company.
An experienced female Japanese sales manager was running the business there, but she wanted to leave the hotel industry and join one of the Japanese corporate company in KL. So I received the first offer from another company if I wanted to take over her position.
The offer was attractive. In Shangri-la, I was earning not so much different from a local sales executive would earn, but Concorde offered to treat me as an expatriate. So the net income was nearly double, the tax was paid by the hotel, and most of all they offered the accommodation in the hotel with full meals and room service facilities.
Since I was not happy continuing the relationship with the boyfriend at that time, it looked such a promising new life moving out from the shared apartment with him.
So I accepted the offer and broke up with the boyfriend from the US. I met both the Japanese Director of Sales and the resident manager Mr Lau, and the both looked very understanding bosses. Now I was not a sales executive, but became a sales manager.
After finishing a major event for Fuji Xerox, I moved to Concorde Hotel, both the office and private room. I sent the letter to all the clients that now I work for Concorde Hotel. Everything looked perfect.
But, there was a new challenge of life waiting for me there.
The immediate boss was not the ones I met before. It was a mid-aged Chinese lady who was the Director of Sales & Marketing, and she was not happy to have a 24-year-old Japanese sales manager from Shangri-la Hotel, the 5 star in front of her.
Even until today, she has been the most difficult boss and least logical. For example, there was a meeting briefing at 8:45am and I came in to the office before 8:30am, but she was not happy. According to her, since I live in the hotel itself, I should come in much earlier than anyone else.
Her favorite phrase was "Yukiko, I am so disappointed." And that was used for most of the staff in the sales department very often. She was constantly disappointed and very hard to please her no matter what we did.
In one case, there was an in-house Japanese young female guest who was approached by a waiter in the hotel's coffee shop, and she checked out as she was scared when the waiter came to her room one night.
The lady boss said, "Yukiko, that is your fault." I could not believe my ears. What did I do?
She said, "Because you did not greet her and meet her upon check-in and give her your business card to contact for any inconvenience, she checked out without telling us what happened. We could have done something to make up with her if you did your job."
She was like that to almost everyone in the office, and many staff left the hotel because of her. I was resented from time to time, but I learned to live with it after a while because the sales team was quite united and we had buddies to complain about her if you can't stand.
Also, the bosses above her were excellent. Both the resident manager and the general manager, Mr Lee from Singapore, were aware of what was happening and always encouraged and supported me.
When the lady boss was reluctant to confirm my employment after the probation, it was Mr Lee who did so. He was very sharp and talkative man with a lot of charms, and very Singaporean.
In Concorde Hotel, there were less VIPs since it was not the 5 star hotel. But we had many guests from Japanese manufacturing companies like Hitachi, Matsushita, and Toshiba as well as many long term guests.
1996 was such a glorious year for my career as a sales manager. The total sales under my accounts was almost RM6Million, and Mr Lee referred me to others saying, "You know, she is my 6 Million woman from the Japanese sector." My business trips to all over Malaysia and Singapore did pay off that year.
Tuesday, 10 June 2008
Life of a Sales Executive: VIP and Convention
The first VIP I received in Shangri-la Hotel was the Prime Minister of Janan at that time: Tomiichi Murayama.
It was like a big project. It was mainly led by my Malay colleague Fadzlon, but I spent all my time preparing and receiving the Prime Minister.
The security was very tight. Both the secret service from Japan and Malaysia were there to make sure of Mr Murayama spent the safe visit.
After the Prime Minister, the Foreign Minister of Japan also came and stayed in Shangri-la a few month later, but it was not that serious.
One of the member of the House of Representatives wanted to have a dinner with young Japanese people working in Kuala Lumpur. As I had a few friends in the Embassy of Japan, I was invited to the dinner with a few more Japanese ladies from other hotels.
He was young and friendly. He asked how it was to be working in Kuala Lumpur, and he offered Japanese sake to us during the dinner (he was a good and heavy drinker). And suddenly, he announced that he wanted to play golf the next day. As the dinner was held on Friday night, we were asked if we could play golf with him.
At that time, I only played golf once in the golf course. I told him I'm too lousy to play with him.
But he said that was just for fun and it doesn't matter if I was good or lousy. He hadn't played golf for more than 10 years so he would prefer to play with non-serious players.
That unexpected request from the member of Diet made the Embassy officer jump, but the golf next day was arranged last minute and I played golf with him.
He said the last time he played golf, he was working in a bank in Japan, and he was doing so very well until the emergency phone call stopped him in the 9th hole.
The emergency call told him that his father committed suicide and asked him to rush to the hospital.
Ever since, he said, he did not want to play golf and has not played.
His name is Shoichi Nakagawa, who became the Minister of Agriculture, Forestry and Fisheries under the Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi, and now he holds one of the main position in the LDP.
Besides working for VIPs, I was assigned to look after one big project in 2005: Mitsubishi Motors Dealers' Convention. The group of 800 dealers who had a outstanding performance the year before was invited to the trip to Kuala Lumpur. It was one of the largest corporate groups with many banquets.
The group was split to two, 400 each with 200 rooms, and they checked in and out on different dates. In the middle, the main dinner was held for all to participate. They had handsome budget, so everything had to be perfectly planned to impress the guests.
Logistics of the luggage for 800 guests had to be planned, the rooming list has to be arranged wisely, and the entertainment for the main dinner had to be first class.
I contacted the Malaysia Tourism Promotion Board and sought assistance. As the guests were all Japanese and did not speak much English, the entertainment had to be good without using the language.
MTPB promised to back me up and arranged the best dance group and the military band for the event.
Each banquet room was decorated with different theme: One became a jungle, other became a beach...the entire function space was turned into a theme park just for one evening.
During the convention group's stay, I also stayed in the hotel and worked with a minimum sleep. I think I only slept less than 12 hours in total for 4 days.
For the night of the main dinner, 800 guests were in the main banquet room. They were happy with the traditional dance and military band.
When the military band played "Koujo no Tsuki", the large applause erupted from the audience. They were middle to elderly Japanese couple, and they were touched by the traditional Japanese tune played by Malaysian military band since some were old enough to know what happened during the WW2.
I was exhausted but proud of the successful convention. The project produced high occupancy rate and large banquet revenue to the hotel, and left wonderful memory to the dealers and me, personally.
I still remember a big smile on my boss, Yawata-san, after the last bus departed the hotel after the convention. Even though it was such an important and large group for the hotel, he completely let me handle the project alone. It became a great experience and gave me a confidence that I can handle something meaningful to the business.
It was like a big project. It was mainly led by my Malay colleague Fadzlon, but I spent all my time preparing and receiving the Prime Minister.
The security was very tight. Both the secret service from Japan and Malaysia were there to make sure of Mr Murayama spent the safe visit.
After the Prime Minister, the Foreign Minister of Japan also came and stayed in Shangri-la a few month later, but it was not that serious.
One of the member of the House of Representatives wanted to have a dinner with young Japanese people working in Kuala Lumpur. As I had a few friends in the Embassy of Japan, I was invited to the dinner with a few more Japanese ladies from other hotels.
He was young and friendly. He asked how it was to be working in Kuala Lumpur, and he offered Japanese sake to us during the dinner (he was a good and heavy drinker). And suddenly, he announced that he wanted to play golf the next day. As the dinner was held on Friday night, we were asked if we could play golf with him.
At that time, I only played golf once in the golf course. I told him I'm too lousy to play with him.
But he said that was just for fun and it doesn't matter if I was good or lousy. He hadn't played golf for more than 10 years so he would prefer to play with non-serious players.
That unexpected request from the member of Diet made the Embassy officer jump, but the golf next day was arranged last minute and I played golf with him.
He said the last time he played golf, he was working in a bank in Japan, and he was doing so very well until the emergency phone call stopped him in the 9th hole.
The emergency call told him that his father committed suicide and asked him to rush to the hospital.
Ever since, he said, he did not want to play golf and has not played.
His name is Shoichi Nakagawa, who became the Minister of Agriculture, Forestry and Fisheries under the Prime Minister Junichiro Koizumi, and now he holds one of the main position in the LDP.
Besides working for VIPs, I was assigned to look after one big project in 2005: Mitsubishi Motors Dealers' Convention. The group of 800 dealers who had a outstanding performance the year before was invited to the trip to Kuala Lumpur. It was one of the largest corporate groups with many banquets.
The group was split to two, 400 each with 200 rooms, and they checked in and out on different dates. In the middle, the main dinner was held for all to participate. They had handsome budget, so everything had to be perfectly planned to impress the guests.
Logistics of the luggage for 800 guests had to be planned, the rooming list has to be arranged wisely, and the entertainment for the main dinner had to be first class.
I contacted the Malaysia Tourism Promotion Board and sought assistance. As the guests were all Japanese and did not speak much English, the entertainment had to be good without using the language.
MTPB promised to back me up and arranged the best dance group and the military band for the event.
Each banquet room was decorated with different theme: One became a jungle, other became a beach...the entire function space was turned into a theme park just for one evening.
During the convention group's stay, I also stayed in the hotel and worked with a minimum sleep. I think I only slept less than 12 hours in total for 4 days.
For the night of the main dinner, 800 guests were in the main banquet room. They were happy with the traditional dance and military band.
When the military band played "Koujo no Tsuki", the large applause erupted from the audience. They were middle to elderly Japanese couple, and they were touched by the traditional Japanese tune played by Malaysian military band since some were old enough to know what happened during the WW2.
I was exhausted but proud of the successful convention. The project produced high occupancy rate and large banquet revenue to the hotel, and left wonderful memory to the dealers and me, personally.
I still remember a big smile on my boss, Yawata-san, after the last bus departed the hotel after the convention. Even though it was such an important and large group for the hotel, he completely let me handle the project alone. It became a great experience and gave me a confidence that I can handle something meaningful to the business.
Thursday, 1 May 2008
Shangri-la Hotel KL: A Whole New World
Besides a HR manager, I was interviewed by two gentlemen to get hired by Shangri-la Hotel Kuala Lumpur - the gorgeous five star hotel in the heart of KL.
One was a Japanese senior sales manager, Yawata-san, who was tall and smart looking man in thirties. He looked at my CV and told me that the guest service officer was already hired and no available position. But there is one as a sales executive.
I was surprised because I never thought of doing sales. As I had a few part-time jobs in restaurants and hotels before I went to US, so that doing guest service would be easy to start. But Yawata-san told me that I would earn a lot more as a sales executive than a guest service officer. With less than 1000USD in possession, I had no choice but to try this new opportunity.
Then Yawata-san asked about my expected salary. I wrote RM1,800, which all my Malaysian friends said it was a good amount to start as a new graduate. He asked me I was sure I meant it in RM, not USD. I said yes. Then he said, "This is too low and you will soon realise you earn so much less than other Japanese in town. You should start from RM2,500."
In 1994, 1USD was equal to 2.5RM. So it was around USD1,000 per month, but as prices are much lower in Malaysia and I was grateful for such a good offer.
I also met the Director of Marketing, Richard Myer, who was from Canada. He seemed to be impressed with my CV, not because of the contents but the format, and asked me if I really wrote it myself.
On the same day of interview, I got a job in Shangri-la Hotel as a new sales executive.
Although a sales executive is the lowest position in the sales and marketing department, it was a part of management team and various benefits were offered. As there was no uniform and had to buy own suits to work, the laundry of own clothes was free. Free meals at the staff canteen and 50% discount in all the restaurants in the hotel. And to experience the hotel itself, the new management staff was told to stay in a guest room one night. Everything was more than I would have asked for.
After the interview I came home and told my boyfriend what happened. He was happy for me and very surprised that I was offered such good terms.
At that time we rented a room in a very shabby apartment in the very convenient location with his female cousin, her boyfriend, and other people. It was behind another five star hotel called Istana, and it cost us only 200RM per month. But there was no air conditioning (again) and no hot water (again). My living condition was still at the bottom, but I did not mind. I knew that was a start line and the journey was just about to begin.
To start working in the five star hotel, I had to buy a few sets of suits, a bag, a business card case, cosmetics, proper shoes etc. There was Isetan, a Japanese department store, in Kuala Lumpur, and I bought most of them there using last USD I had. I had to choose everything as less expensive as possible.
I remember the first day at work. I was taken to the sales department, and given a desk in a cubical. I loved working there - all nicely air cond and beautiful furniture in corridors and lobby. Nicely dressed guests and staff were walking around. It was so much better than staying at home which was constantly hot and uncomfortable.
Yawata-san, my now immediate boss, took me to Nadaman for lunch a few times a week. Nadaman is an exclusive Japanese restaurant in the hotel where I would not go there if he doesn't buy me or had no staff discount. It was really a whole new world to me.
In this new fancy environment, I worked and worked so happily until my boyfriend complained that I worked too hard.
I went to the office before 8am to avoid the horrible traffic jam, and came home often after 11pm. After my boyfriend left his home, where all he wanted to do was to please his parents, he became sweet and caring to me again. Though he could go home so much earlier, he always came to the hotel to pick me up after work and cooked for me at home.
But by that time, I could not forget how he treated me in Kedah when I had no one to rely on. I started having distrust in him that he would always give priority to his parents over me.
So, working in the hotel long hours gave me a good excuse to have some distance from him, and this accelerated me to work even harder. And this made my bosses happy too.
My other colleagues were hard working too. There were many Malaysian Chinese, and a few Malay and Indian in the office, but most of them worked so very hard. As we spend such a long time almost everyday (I worked over weekends too), we had a strong bonding.
The time flew like light when you worked like that. The year 1994 ended with the light speed mostly in Shangri-la Hotel.
One was a Japanese senior sales manager, Yawata-san, who was tall and smart looking man in thirties. He looked at my CV and told me that the guest service officer was already hired and no available position. But there is one as a sales executive.
I was surprised because I never thought of doing sales. As I had a few part-time jobs in restaurants and hotels before I went to US, so that doing guest service would be easy to start. But Yawata-san told me that I would earn a lot more as a sales executive than a guest service officer. With less than 1000USD in possession, I had no choice but to try this new opportunity.
Then Yawata-san asked about my expected salary. I wrote RM1,800, which all my Malaysian friends said it was a good amount to start as a new graduate. He asked me I was sure I meant it in RM, not USD. I said yes. Then he said, "This is too low and you will soon realise you earn so much less than other Japanese in town. You should start from RM2,500."
In 1994, 1USD was equal to 2.5RM. So it was around USD1,000 per month, but as prices are much lower in Malaysia and I was grateful for such a good offer.
I also met the Director of Marketing, Richard Myer, who was from Canada. He seemed to be impressed with my CV, not because of the contents but the format, and asked me if I really wrote it myself.
On the same day of interview, I got a job in Shangri-la Hotel as a new sales executive.
Although a sales executive is the lowest position in the sales and marketing department, it was a part of management team and various benefits were offered. As there was no uniform and had to buy own suits to work, the laundry of own clothes was free. Free meals at the staff canteen and 50% discount in all the restaurants in the hotel. And to experience the hotel itself, the new management staff was told to stay in a guest room one night. Everything was more than I would have asked for.
After the interview I came home and told my boyfriend what happened. He was happy for me and very surprised that I was offered such good terms.
At that time we rented a room in a very shabby apartment in the very convenient location with his female cousin, her boyfriend, and other people. It was behind another five star hotel called Istana, and it cost us only 200RM per month. But there was no air conditioning (again) and no hot water (again). My living condition was still at the bottom, but I did not mind. I knew that was a start line and the journey was just about to begin.
To start working in the five star hotel, I had to buy a few sets of suits, a bag, a business card case, cosmetics, proper shoes etc. There was Isetan, a Japanese department store, in Kuala Lumpur, and I bought most of them there using last USD I had. I had to choose everything as less expensive as possible.
I remember the first day at work. I was taken to the sales department, and given a desk in a cubical. I loved working there - all nicely air cond and beautiful furniture in corridors and lobby. Nicely dressed guests and staff were walking around. It was so much better than staying at home which was constantly hot and uncomfortable.
Yawata-san, my now immediate boss, took me to Nadaman for lunch a few times a week. Nadaman is an exclusive Japanese restaurant in the hotel where I would not go there if he doesn't buy me or had no staff discount. It was really a whole new world to me.
In this new fancy environment, I worked and worked so happily until my boyfriend complained that I worked too hard.
I went to the office before 8am to avoid the horrible traffic jam, and came home often after 11pm. After my boyfriend left his home, where all he wanted to do was to please his parents, he became sweet and caring to me again. Though he could go home so much earlier, he always came to the hotel to pick me up after work and cooked for me at home.
But by that time, I could not forget how he treated me in Kedah when I had no one to rely on. I started having distrust in him that he would always give priority to his parents over me.
So, working in the hotel long hours gave me a good excuse to have some distance from him, and this accelerated me to work even harder. And this made my bosses happy too.
My other colleagues were hard working too. There were many Malaysian Chinese, and a few Malay and Indian in the office, but most of them worked so very hard. As we spend such a long time almost everyday (I worked over weekends too), we had a strong bonding.
The time flew like light when you worked like that. The year 1994 ended with the light speed mostly in Shangri-la Hotel.
Wednesday, 16 April 2008
1994: Alor Setar, Malaysia
Los Angeles to Kuala Lumpur was a long long flight.
Stopped at Taipei for refueling, I had a coca-cola in the airport lounge. "Coca Cola" was written in Chinese on that coke can, and that made me realise that I was now in Asia.
It was May 1994 when I landed Kuala Lumpur for the first time. But I had only one hour in Kuala Lumpur, as I had to take another domestic flight to get to my boyfriend's hometown, Alor Setar. I was travelling with only two suitcases which were all my belongings except for some books I shipped separately.
Alor Setar is the capital city of the Kedah State, but it was still very local, "kampong", place in Malaysia. It was a tiny little airport and the outside the airport was mainly paddy fields.
My boyfriend, his parents, and brother and sister came to pick me up with a small bouquet of flower. They were kind and greeted me with full of affection.
We went to his house where his parents and second brother's family lived together. My boyfriend had two elder brothers and one elder sister. They were all married except for the eldest brother, who had a steady girlfriend and lived in Penang Island.
His second brother had a young daughter. She was three years old and called NgaNga as nickname. She was such a cute girl and was curious about me, a complete stranger to her.
So I stayed with the family until both my boyfriend and I found the job in Kuala Lumpur. Although it was deadly hot everyday, his father believed the air-cond was not good for health therefore there was no air-cond in the house.
I hardly slept at night because the ceiling fan was not enough for 35-37 degrees weather. Even at night, it was above 30 degrees.
Mosquitoes found me a delicious new flavored blood, and one time I had more than 20 bites on my legs.
There was no hot water for shower either. There was a hot water tank, but it was not turned on because everyone thought it was not necessary. They thought it was hot enough to take a cold shower. Though I did not agree, I had no choice but to follow the rest.
When in Rome, do as the Romans do.
With much straggle, I tried to comply with the new life style in Alor Setar. After all, I was a short term guest.
My boyfriend's mother was old Chinese lady who spoke no English. Though his father and brother spoke good English as they do shoe retail business in the centre of Alor Setar, all the ladies including NgaNga did not speak English. So most of the conversation at home was carried out in Cantonese which I did not speak at all.
However his mother was a kind, hard-working lady. She washed cloths without using the washing machine, though there was one in the house. Using electricity seems to be such a waste. She was a great cook as well.
Meals she cooked were all excellent, but I could not eat so much, mostly because of the heat. But she worried that I do not eat much because I do not like her food, so that she insisted me to eat more.
I tried. I think I was eating as much as I normally do, but that did not please her enough.
Then my boyfriend turned to me and told me to eat more. I told him that is not possible, but he said I MUST eat to please his mother.
I resented.
We had fights over such stupid topics over and over. In the family, my boyfriend was the youngest boy and most beloved. He was always a good boy and studied hard to please his parents. He wanted to show off his family what a wonderful girlfriend he brought from US. His attitude towards my eating his mother's meal became a serious stress and I went to see a doctor once. I developed a stomach trouble.
I looked at the return ticket to Los Angeles many times. I wanted to go back to Fresno as David told me: He said if I can't stand the life in Malaysia, just come back to Fresno no matter what. The ticket was still valid. The prices of single and return ticket were almost the same, so I bought one year open ticket just in case.
But I did not go back as a tourist and become illegal alien. I only had $1,400 with me. I could not rely on friends just because I did not like Malaysia much.
Three months later, my boyfriend and I moved to Kuala Lumpur to stay with his cousin to find the permanent jobs. He decided working in Alor Setar or Penang was not a good idea.
I thought of working in a Hotel or Air Line industries because there would be Japanese guests, and they would like to have a Japanese person to attend them. Doing the business with the Japanese, the language is always a barrier, so that I had an advantage.
From Alor Setar, I applied to Shangri-la Hotel Kuala Lumpur as I found the newspaper ad to look for a Japanese Guest Relation Officer. I wrote a CV and sent to the hotel HR dept. There was an instant reply and they wanted to interview me in Kuala Lumpur.
In the painful three months, I became close to NgaNga, so it was very sad to leave her. She called me "Yappun CheChe", means "Japanese sister". I loved her very much but I had to move on. I could not live in the small town of Alor Setar anymore.
When we departed, my boyfriend's father gave me a small wallet with RM100. He was always kind and supportive to me. I appreciated, and left the house for good.
Stopped at Taipei for refueling, I had a coca-cola in the airport lounge. "Coca Cola" was written in Chinese on that coke can, and that made me realise that I was now in Asia.
It was May 1994 when I landed Kuala Lumpur for the first time. But I had only one hour in Kuala Lumpur, as I had to take another domestic flight to get to my boyfriend's hometown, Alor Setar. I was travelling with only two suitcases which were all my belongings except for some books I shipped separately.
Alor Setar is the capital city of the Kedah State, but it was still very local, "kampong", place in Malaysia. It was a tiny little airport and the outside the airport was mainly paddy fields.
My boyfriend, his parents, and brother and sister came to pick me up with a small bouquet of flower. They were kind and greeted me with full of affection.
We went to his house where his parents and second brother's family lived together. My boyfriend had two elder brothers and one elder sister. They were all married except for the eldest brother, who had a steady girlfriend and lived in Penang Island.
His second brother had a young daughter. She was three years old and called NgaNga as nickname. She was such a cute girl and was curious about me, a complete stranger to her.
So I stayed with the family until both my boyfriend and I found the job in Kuala Lumpur. Although it was deadly hot everyday, his father believed the air-cond was not good for health therefore there was no air-cond in the house.
I hardly slept at night because the ceiling fan was not enough for 35-37 degrees weather. Even at night, it was above 30 degrees.
Mosquitoes found me a delicious new flavored blood, and one time I had more than 20 bites on my legs.
There was no hot water for shower either. There was a hot water tank, but it was not turned on because everyone thought it was not necessary. They thought it was hot enough to take a cold shower. Though I did not agree, I had no choice but to follow the rest.
When in Rome, do as the Romans do.
With much straggle, I tried to comply with the new life style in Alor Setar. After all, I was a short term guest.
My boyfriend's mother was old Chinese lady who spoke no English. Though his father and brother spoke good English as they do shoe retail business in the centre of Alor Setar, all the ladies including NgaNga did not speak English. So most of the conversation at home was carried out in Cantonese which I did not speak at all.
However his mother was a kind, hard-working lady. She washed cloths without using the washing machine, though there was one in the house. Using electricity seems to be such a waste. She was a great cook as well.
Meals she cooked were all excellent, but I could not eat so much, mostly because of the heat. But she worried that I do not eat much because I do not like her food, so that she insisted me to eat more.
I tried. I think I was eating as much as I normally do, but that did not please her enough.
Then my boyfriend turned to me and told me to eat more. I told him that is not possible, but he said I MUST eat to please his mother.
I resented.
We had fights over such stupid topics over and over. In the family, my boyfriend was the youngest boy and most beloved. He was always a good boy and studied hard to please his parents. He wanted to show off his family what a wonderful girlfriend he brought from US. His attitude towards my eating his mother's meal became a serious stress and I went to see a doctor once. I developed a stomach trouble.
I looked at the return ticket to Los Angeles many times. I wanted to go back to Fresno as David told me: He said if I can't stand the life in Malaysia, just come back to Fresno no matter what. The ticket was still valid. The prices of single and return ticket were almost the same, so I bought one year open ticket just in case.
But I did not go back as a tourist and become illegal alien. I only had $1,400 with me. I could not rely on friends just because I did not like Malaysia much.
Three months later, my boyfriend and I moved to Kuala Lumpur to stay with his cousin to find the permanent jobs. He decided working in Alor Setar or Penang was not a good idea.
I thought of working in a Hotel or Air Line industries because there would be Japanese guests, and they would like to have a Japanese person to attend them. Doing the business with the Japanese, the language is always a barrier, so that I had an advantage.
From Alor Setar, I applied to Shangri-la Hotel Kuala Lumpur as I found the newspaper ad to look for a Japanese Guest Relation Officer. I wrote a CV and sent to the hotel HR dept. There was an instant reply and they wanted to interview me in Kuala Lumpur.
In the painful three months, I became close to NgaNga, so it was very sad to leave her. She called me "Yappun CheChe", means "Japanese sister". I loved her very much but I had to move on. I could not live in the small town of Alor Setar anymore.
When we departed, my boyfriend's father gave me a small wallet with RM100. He was always kind and supportive to me. I appreciated, and left the house for good.
Tuesday, 15 April 2008
A Midsummer Night's Dream
So, at last I reached where I can study psychology.
In California State University, Fresno, I was enrolled with several psychology classes: Introduction to Counseling, Child Psychology, Cognitive Psychology, etc. Registering those classes was such an exciting moment.
Meanwhile, after a brief stay at an old Japanese lady's house during a break, I moved to another studio apartment near CSU Fresno. This unit was designed to share a kitchen with the neighbour, but you had a complete privacy in your own room. As students do not use much of the kitchen, it was quite comfortable and reasonable that way.
I met new friends in CSU Fresno.
Some came from Malaysia and I started seeing one of Malaysian Chinese who also worked in one of the Japanese restaurant. The other Korean boyfriend I had from Bakersfield moved on to other Korean girl and also moved to Los Angeles.
It is a bit funny that I never dated anyone from Japan or US. Though I had several close friends, it never happened as I anticipated.
And for some reason, I made a very close friend who also lived in the same apartment lot and he was from Kuwait via London where his family lived. He, I call him Al here, was a gay who never had any interest in women whole his life except for Madonna. I liked him a lot and we hang around together like closest girlfriends. He came from a wealthy family: he loved Jean-Paul Gaultier and dressed smart all the time.
With him and two other Malaysian girls were the gang, and we often spent evening together.
And one day, Al confessed he was HIV positive did not think he would live long.
At that time he was 21 years old. Being young, cool, and stylish, there was no sign of illness in him. I had a hard time accepting the fact.
By the middle of the first quarter in CSU Fresno, I discovered that my family back in Japan can't send any tuition this year as my father's business got into a problem and so was my mother. Trying to help father out, my mother became a guarantor to his loan, now his debt was on her as well.
The tuition fee for the foreign students was very high. I managed to earn enough for living expenses, but that is never enough to pay for the tuition.
So helpless and depressed, I walked towards the registration office in CSU Fresno. I had no choice but to withdraw all the classes because I could not pay.
F-1 student visa expires if you are not enrolled full-time. Not only that I had to withdraw all the classes I finally managed to register, but also I had to leave US in a few months.
My part-time restaurant employer was a successful and kind Japanese gentleman, and he offered me an option. His friend in San Fransisco could hire me but without a legal permit.
Though I was tempted, I did not want to be a illegal alien and live like a criminal. I thanked him for kind help, but I decided to leave US if I had to.
I called Embassy of Japan to find out if there was any scholarship offered by Japanese government or charity organisation. The lady picked up the phone told me off there was no such thing.
The scholarship in California was limited to the residents at least for the undergraduate. There really was no one to seek help. It was probably one of the most bitter moment of my life. I was helpless 22 years old with no degree (except AA from Bakersfield College) and no proper working experience. No green card or right to work. Though I loved living in Fresno, I could not stay there anymore.
It happened to be the time for my Malaysian boyfriend and other friends to finish school and go back to Malaysia for good. He asked me if I wanted to come with him and see if I could find the job there. My friends said that the economy in Malaysia was booming and it would a good time to go there.
But I had no idea where or what kind place Malaysia was. My American friends were all worried because they also had no idea and did not sound like it was a wise thing to do. I was scared too. Malaysia is an Islamic country and I was not sure if a foreign woman like me can survive there.
The other choice was to go back to Japan and save enough money to come back to Fresno. But both Japan and US were under the recession and there was no guarantee that I can earn enough money to come back soon...or to find a good job in the first place.
So I made the decision. Let me go to Malaysia and see what's up there. If there is a good job, fine, I shall come back to US with enough savings. If not, then I would finally give up and go back to Japan as the last resort.
My boyfriend went back to Malaysia first to explain his family about me. As we planned to live with his family until we find the jobs, so he needed time to speak to his family - a typical Chinese family, he said - to accept me.
The day before I finally left Fresno, I spent the whole day with Al. We talked a lot...we cried together and we promised to see each other again in future.
At that time, Madonna's "I Remember" was popular. He said he would always remember me when he listened that song.
I too remember him every time I listen to that song.
From Malaysia I wrote to him once or twice, but he did not somehow reply to me. I was too scared to call the number in London and Kuwait he gave me, because his family might give me the worst news I fear. So until this day, I lost in touch with him. But I remember his friendship and miss him very much.
I took Greyhound from Fresno to Los Angeles. Looking at the window, the bus passed the familiar scenery of the city of Fresno. I cried silently. I felt indignation with my fate.
And I swore that when I come back here one day, I come back legally with enough fund to support myself. I swore that I would never be helpless again: I will take over the control over my life.
My university life as a psych major had vanished as if it was a midsummer night's dream.
But I still had a hope. I knew things could not go worse than this. It could only get better, not worse.
In California State University, Fresno, I was enrolled with several psychology classes: Introduction to Counseling, Child Psychology, Cognitive Psychology, etc. Registering those classes was such an exciting moment.
Meanwhile, after a brief stay at an old Japanese lady's house during a break, I moved to another studio apartment near CSU Fresno. This unit was designed to share a kitchen with the neighbour, but you had a complete privacy in your own room. As students do not use much of the kitchen, it was quite comfortable and reasonable that way.
I met new friends in CSU Fresno.
Some came from Malaysia and I started seeing one of Malaysian Chinese who also worked in one of the Japanese restaurant. The other Korean boyfriend I had from Bakersfield moved on to other Korean girl and also moved to Los Angeles.
It is a bit funny that I never dated anyone from Japan or US. Though I had several close friends, it never happened as I anticipated.
And for some reason, I made a very close friend who also lived in the same apartment lot and he was from Kuwait via London where his family lived. He, I call him Al here, was a gay who never had any interest in women whole his life except for Madonna. I liked him a lot and we hang around together like closest girlfriends. He came from a wealthy family: he loved Jean-Paul Gaultier and dressed smart all the time.
With him and two other Malaysian girls were the gang, and we often spent evening together.
And one day, Al confessed he was HIV positive did not think he would live long.
At that time he was 21 years old. Being young, cool, and stylish, there was no sign of illness in him. I had a hard time accepting the fact.
By the middle of the first quarter in CSU Fresno, I discovered that my family back in Japan can't send any tuition this year as my father's business got into a problem and so was my mother. Trying to help father out, my mother became a guarantor to his loan, now his debt was on her as well.
The tuition fee for the foreign students was very high. I managed to earn enough for living expenses, but that is never enough to pay for the tuition.
So helpless and depressed, I walked towards the registration office in CSU Fresno. I had no choice but to withdraw all the classes because I could not pay.
F-1 student visa expires if you are not enrolled full-time. Not only that I had to withdraw all the classes I finally managed to register, but also I had to leave US in a few months.
My part-time restaurant employer was a successful and kind Japanese gentleman, and he offered me an option. His friend in San Fransisco could hire me but without a legal permit.
Though I was tempted, I did not want to be a illegal alien and live like a criminal. I thanked him for kind help, but I decided to leave US if I had to.
I called Embassy of Japan to find out if there was any scholarship offered by Japanese government or charity organisation. The lady picked up the phone told me off there was no such thing.
The scholarship in California was limited to the residents at least for the undergraduate. There really was no one to seek help. It was probably one of the most bitter moment of my life. I was helpless 22 years old with no degree (except AA from Bakersfield College) and no proper working experience. No green card or right to work. Though I loved living in Fresno, I could not stay there anymore.
It happened to be the time for my Malaysian boyfriend and other friends to finish school and go back to Malaysia for good. He asked me if I wanted to come with him and see if I could find the job there. My friends said that the economy in Malaysia was booming and it would a good time to go there.
But I had no idea where or what kind place Malaysia was. My American friends were all worried because they also had no idea and did not sound like it was a wise thing to do. I was scared too. Malaysia is an Islamic country and I was not sure if a foreign woman like me can survive there.
The other choice was to go back to Japan and save enough money to come back to Fresno. But both Japan and US were under the recession and there was no guarantee that I can earn enough money to come back soon...or to find a good job in the first place.
So I made the decision. Let me go to Malaysia and see what's up there. If there is a good job, fine, I shall come back to US with enough savings. If not, then I would finally give up and go back to Japan as the last resort.
My boyfriend went back to Malaysia first to explain his family about me. As we planned to live with his family until we find the jobs, so he needed time to speak to his family - a typical Chinese family, he said - to accept me.
The day before I finally left Fresno, I spent the whole day with Al. We talked a lot...we cried together and we promised to see each other again in future.
At that time, Madonna's "I Remember" was popular. He said he would always remember me when he listened that song.
I too remember him every time I listen to that song.
From Malaysia I wrote to him once or twice, but he did not somehow reply to me. I was too scared to call the number in London and Kuwait he gave me, because his family might give me the worst news I fear. So until this day, I lost in touch with him. But I remember his friendship and miss him very much.
I took Greyhound from Fresno to Los Angeles. Looking at the window, the bus passed the familiar scenery of the city of Fresno. I cried silently. I felt indignation with my fate.
And I swore that when I come back here one day, I come back legally with enough fund to support myself. I swore that I would never be helpless again: I will take over the control over my life.
My university life as a psych major had vanished as if it was a midsummer night's dream.
But I still had a hope. I knew things could not go worse than this. It could only get better, not worse.
Sunday, 13 April 2008
Part-time Jobs and Graduation Ceremony
In both Bakersfield and Fresno, I did varieties of part-time jobs. Unlike my other rich-foreign-student friends, I had no choice but to work to pay my bills.
I clearly remember my monthly expense total. It was $600 including rent, utilities, food, gas, and other personal expenses. I would not have survived in San Fransisco or Los Angeles, but it was somehow possible in Bakersfield and Fresno. The rent was only 250 to 300.
The first dollar I earned in US was from doing ushering in Bakersfield College stadium during the football match. The American football, of course. As I get to watch the game for free, I learned the rules of the American football at the same time.
But what I did mostly was a waitress in Japanese restaurants. I knew the menu, and knew the language if the Japanese guests came, and a Japanese waitress' presence made the restaurant look more authentic. They also provided a meal after work. Having a free dinner several times a week was a big advantage.
There is no custom to give a tip in Japan, so that I never earned a tip until I went to California. Customers gave 10-15% tips from the bill, and actually the tip kept me going to cover the daily expenses rather than the hourly pay of the minimum wage $7.25 per hour at that time.
Besides waitress, I did a part-time tutor for French, Japanese, and English.
Yes, French...I completely forgot everything now, but I was taking French classes in Bakersfield and somehow I was a top student in that class. So I was introduced to teach a junior-high boy at $10 per hour, but he was too young and so I was, and it did not work out. I always loved being taught and I still do, but I never made a good teacher.
Teaching Japanese seemed a lot easier. I had sessions with a gentleman who was so willing to learn the language, but finding a good textbook was not very easy in Fresno at that time. He just wanted to know the basic conversation, but teaching the very basic of your own language requires a lot of patience than other languages. I think I was a lousy teacher there too.
In one occasion, a friend introduced me a tutor job to teach English to a Japanese high school girl who was in Bakersfield and was staying with a local family. So I went to their house to teach her English several times because she could not communicate with the family though the entire purpose for her being there was to learn English and culture from them.
The host family's house was at the edge of Bakersfield and looked quite shabby. It seemed that earning extra income by accepting foreign students was the sole reason of them to have her in the house. The Japanese girl looked younger than her age and so vulnerable. She also looked lonely and lost. I do not know if my English lessons ever helped her at all, but she went back to Japan a few months later anyways. I realised not everyone enjoys living in US.
In Fresno, I did a house-keeping too. In my speech class, one of the other student was a retired lady, and she felt sorry for my situation and hired me to help her clean the house.
It was a beautiful house and I worked seriously, but I do not think I was any good as a house-keeper either.
So here are the lessons learned from my part-time jobs: I make OK as a waitress, but NG as a teacher and house-keeper.
Another thing I learned was that I can somehow survive with whatever I do. Though it was very financially tight situation, I never had to ask money from anybody back in Japan for living expenses. Well, even if I wanted, I did not have anyone to turn to anyways.
But I was rather proudly independent in Fresno. Young and independent...cool.
In one time I did not speak Japanese for nearly six months, and I forgot what to say on the phone when I called mother. My English seemed to have improved. Still keeping As from the classes except for English literature (B) and Calculus (C).
Oh, I hated Calculus and I still do. I spent one summer only doing Calculus full-time, but I never got it. It is such an irony that I married a man who loves Calculus and Physics than any other subjects. Those are the two subjects I never appreciated.
After one semester in Fresno City College, I graduated from Bakersfield College with honors. The Class of 1993. I was happy attending the graduation ceremony with honors' yellow belt, but no one managed to attend it from my family. My mother could not afford to fly, and I do not recall why my uncle did not bother to drive from Los Angeles. Anyhow, a few friends attended the ceremony for me, and I was happy enough with that.
Now I secured the minimum AA degree, so that I transferred to Cal State Fresno.
At long last, I started taking real psychology classes I always wanted to study. It was a long way from the time I experienced the first illogical bullying in junior high. I was so ready and excited to learn everything about psychology.
I clearly remember my monthly expense total. It was $600 including rent, utilities, food, gas, and other personal expenses. I would not have survived in San Fransisco or Los Angeles, but it was somehow possible in Bakersfield and Fresno. The rent was only 250 to 300.
The first dollar I earned in US was from doing ushering in Bakersfield College stadium during the football match. The American football, of course. As I get to watch the game for free, I learned the rules of the American football at the same time.
But what I did mostly was a waitress in Japanese restaurants. I knew the menu, and knew the language if the Japanese guests came, and a Japanese waitress' presence made the restaurant look more authentic. They also provided a meal after work. Having a free dinner several times a week was a big advantage.
There is no custom to give a tip in Japan, so that I never earned a tip until I went to California. Customers gave 10-15% tips from the bill, and actually the tip kept me going to cover the daily expenses rather than the hourly pay of the minimum wage $7.25 per hour at that time.
Besides waitress, I did a part-time tutor for French, Japanese, and English.
Yes, French...I completely forgot everything now, but I was taking French classes in Bakersfield and somehow I was a top student in that class. So I was introduced to teach a junior-high boy at $10 per hour, but he was too young and so I was, and it did not work out. I always loved being taught and I still do, but I never made a good teacher.
Teaching Japanese seemed a lot easier. I had sessions with a gentleman who was so willing to learn the language, but finding a good textbook was not very easy in Fresno at that time. He just wanted to know the basic conversation, but teaching the very basic of your own language requires a lot of patience than other languages. I think I was a lousy teacher there too.
In one occasion, a friend introduced me a tutor job to teach English to a Japanese high school girl who was in Bakersfield and was staying with a local family. So I went to their house to teach her English several times because she could not communicate with the family though the entire purpose for her being there was to learn English and culture from them.
The host family's house was at the edge of Bakersfield and looked quite shabby. It seemed that earning extra income by accepting foreign students was the sole reason of them to have her in the house. The Japanese girl looked younger than her age and so vulnerable. She also looked lonely and lost. I do not know if my English lessons ever helped her at all, but she went back to Japan a few months later anyways. I realised not everyone enjoys living in US.
In Fresno, I did a house-keeping too. In my speech class, one of the other student was a retired lady, and she felt sorry for my situation and hired me to help her clean the house.
It was a beautiful house and I worked seriously, but I do not think I was any good as a house-keeper either.
So here are the lessons learned from my part-time jobs: I make OK as a waitress, but NG as a teacher and house-keeper.
Another thing I learned was that I can somehow survive with whatever I do. Though it was very financially tight situation, I never had to ask money from anybody back in Japan for living expenses. Well, even if I wanted, I did not have anyone to turn to anyways.
But I was rather proudly independent in Fresno. Young and independent...cool.
In one time I did not speak Japanese for nearly six months, and I forgot what to say on the phone when I called mother. My English seemed to have improved. Still keeping As from the classes except for English literature (B) and Calculus (C).
Oh, I hated Calculus and I still do. I spent one summer only doing Calculus full-time, but I never got it. It is such an irony that I married a man who loves Calculus and Physics than any other subjects. Those are the two subjects I never appreciated.
After one semester in Fresno City College, I graduated from Bakersfield College with honors. The Class of 1993. I was happy attending the graduation ceremony with honors' yellow belt, but no one managed to attend it from my family. My mother could not afford to fly, and I do not recall why my uncle did not bother to drive from Los Angeles. Anyhow, a few friends attended the ceremony for me, and I was happy enough with that.
Now I secured the minimum AA degree, so that I transferred to Cal State Fresno.
At long last, I started taking real psychology classes I always wanted to study. It was a long way from the time I experienced the first illogical bullying in junior high. I was so ready and excited to learn everything about psychology.
Thursday, 10 April 2008
Beginning of the Journey: The World of Star Trek the Next Generation
In Fresno, I found a small studio room on the garage of the house near Fresno City College. As I had a few more classes to complete to earn AA from Bakersfield College, I attended Fresno City College for a semester.
The studio was a cute room. A very small kitchen and a tiny shower room, but that was the first room I had for all by myself.
In the main house, there lived three all-American boys: James, David, and Mark. They were all around my age, and they also attended the same college which was a walking distance.
James' father owned the house, and David, Mark, and I rented a room each and shared the living room in the house. They were all pleasant and kind guys.
James was sensitive and caring, and David was tall (at least 6.3 feet) and kind, and Mark was... a Trekker.
Being a poor student who was barely surviving each week, I did not have extra money for entertainment. So I watched many movies on HBO and rental videos during college years. With occasional movies in theatres, I think I was watching nearly 20 movies a week including re-run. By the time of Oscar nominees announcement, I watched all the nominated movies and discussed with friends which one would win Oscar.
But most of all, Mark rented me the series of Star Trek: the Next Generation. He had the entire series (the season 5 was on that time), so I had the privilege to watch it from the first episode on his VHS.
And I LOVED IT, and love it intensely until today.
Though I liked the original series, it was not like that. I loved the world of Captain Picard, Data, Number One, Dianna, Wolf, and the entire Federation.
If I were born in the 24th century, I would have been a Star Fleet officer for sure.
So my everyday life in Fresno was like this: study, Star Trek TNG, and other movies. Also I played basketball with my housemates. We told David not to jump at all...there was no way to shoot when he was in front of any of us.
When I told them about the tragic incident in Bakersfield. They were very surprised to hear that I knew all the suspects in person. I remember James said,
"Yukiko, don't worry. We don't play Dungeons and Dragons."
The studio was a cute room. A very small kitchen and a tiny shower room, but that was the first room I had for all by myself.
In the main house, there lived three all-American boys: James, David, and Mark. They were all around my age, and they also attended the same college which was a walking distance.
James' father owned the house, and David, Mark, and I rented a room each and shared the living room in the house. They were all pleasant and kind guys.
James was sensitive and caring, and David was tall (at least 6.3 feet) and kind, and Mark was... a Trekker.
Being a poor student who was barely surviving each week, I did not have extra money for entertainment. So I watched many movies on HBO and rental videos during college years. With occasional movies in theatres, I think I was watching nearly 20 movies a week including re-run. By the time of Oscar nominees announcement, I watched all the nominated movies and discussed with friends which one would win Oscar.
But most of all, Mark rented me the series of Star Trek: the Next Generation. He had the entire series (the season 5 was on that time), so I had the privilege to watch it from the first episode on his VHS.
And I LOVED IT, and love it intensely until today.
Though I liked the original series, it was not like that. I loved the world of Captain Picard, Data, Number One, Dianna, Wolf, and the entire Federation.
If I were born in the 24th century, I would have been a Star Fleet officer for sure.
So my everyday life in Fresno was like this: study, Star Trek TNG, and other movies. Also I played basketball with my housemates. We told David not to jump at all...there was no way to shoot when he was in front of any of us.
When I told them about the tragic incident in Bakersfield. They were very surprised to hear that I knew all the suspects in person. I remember James said,
"Yukiko, don't worry. We don't play Dungeons and Dragons."
Monday, 7 April 2008
Tragedy
After living in the dorm for a year, I moved out to the apartment with a friend from the college choir and her boyfriend. We shared two bedroom apartment near school.
My friend, Debby, was about the same age as me, and she had cute little chubby figure with beautiful blond hair. She was a few people who were kind to me in the mostly local students' choir.
To pay for own living expenses, I was working in a Japanese restaurant in town as a waitress. After coming back from work in the evening, Debby's boyfriend sometimes brought his friends to play Dungeons & Dragons and I met them in the living room.
There were three boys: I can't recall their names, but they were 18, 19, and 20 years old and some of them were also attending Bakersfield College. They liked the role playing game, and we talked about general things (like recent movies or events) while we were enjoying ordinal weekday evening together.
There was nothing extraordinary until Debby and I heard that one of the boys parents were killed at home.
We were confused. We were worried that they got into any trouble when we heard that all three boys went missing.
A bit by bit the information came in.
We learned that not only the boy's parents but his brother and sister were also killed with a gun and knife. And it was told that the boys were the suspects.
Why, was the first question. Why would they have to do such things? Is that true? Those boys in our living room could be the suspects of such crime?
Though we prayed hard otherwise, they were the real suspects of such a horrendous crime.
Later, they called Debby's boyfriend asking for money. They took only $150 from the crime scene and ran away to Mexico. Naturally they ran out of money.
Debby's boyfriend called the police, and they went to the restaurant in San Diego pretending to give money. The boys were captured so easily there.
The boys' faces were the top page of the following morning newspaper. They were the youngest homicide suspects in the Kern County.
Debby's boyfriend had no choice but to call the police as Debby was pregnant at that time. He wouldn't take a risk to put her and baby in danger.
As a part of witness protection exercise, they moved out from California not to get traced by the boys and their families. I have not heard from Debby ever since.
At that time I was also planning to move to Fresno, because I knew that I would not be able to afford UCLA, my dream school, and my boyfriend at that time also moved there by chance. Cal State Fresno looked a good alternative to UCLA because Cal State Bakersfield was a bit too small as a university. Foreign students tuition was much cheaper in Cal State Universities than in UC schools.
In the second year, I no longer received the living expense from my parents like the first year, and I was supporting all my expenses. I was hoping at least the school tuition would be sponsored by my father, but it completely stopped shortly after I arrived Fresno as he himself got into financial problems. Later I learned his company filed bankruptcy around that time.
There was a tragedy for my friends and for myself in 1992.
My friend, Debby, was about the same age as me, and she had cute little chubby figure with beautiful blond hair. She was a few people who were kind to me in the mostly local students' choir.
To pay for own living expenses, I was working in a Japanese restaurant in town as a waitress. After coming back from work in the evening, Debby's boyfriend sometimes brought his friends to play Dungeons & Dragons and I met them in the living room.
There were three boys: I can't recall their names, but they were 18, 19, and 20 years old and some of them were also attending Bakersfield College. They liked the role playing game, and we talked about general things (like recent movies or events) while we were enjoying ordinal weekday evening together.
There was nothing extraordinary until Debby and I heard that one of the boys parents were killed at home.
We were confused. We were worried that they got into any trouble when we heard that all three boys went missing.
A bit by bit the information came in.
We learned that not only the boy's parents but his brother and sister were also killed with a gun and knife. And it was told that the boys were the suspects.
Why, was the first question. Why would they have to do such things? Is that true? Those boys in our living room could be the suspects of such crime?
Though we prayed hard otherwise, they were the real suspects of such a horrendous crime.
Later, they called Debby's boyfriend asking for money. They took only $150 from the crime scene and ran away to Mexico. Naturally they ran out of money.
Debby's boyfriend called the police, and they went to the restaurant in San Diego pretending to give money. The boys were captured so easily there.
The boys' faces were the top page of the following morning newspaper. They were the youngest homicide suspects in the Kern County.
Debby's boyfriend had no choice but to call the police as Debby was pregnant at that time. He wouldn't take a risk to put her and baby in danger.
As a part of witness protection exercise, they moved out from California not to get traced by the boys and their families. I have not heard from Debby ever since.
At that time I was also planning to move to Fresno, because I knew that I would not be able to afford UCLA, my dream school, and my boyfriend at that time also moved there by chance. Cal State Fresno looked a good alternative to UCLA because Cal State Bakersfield was a bit too small as a university. Foreign students tuition was much cheaper in Cal State Universities than in UC schools.
In the second year, I no longer received the living expense from my parents like the first year, and I was supporting all my expenses. I was hoping at least the school tuition would be sponsored by my father, but it completely stopped shortly after I arrived Fresno as he himself got into financial problems. Later I learned his company filed bankruptcy around that time.
There was a tragedy for my friends and for myself in 1992.
Sunday, 6 April 2008
Breaking Ice: Power of Music
When your English skill is limited, it is not easy to make friends.
It was not an easy experience to get to know people in the college dorm while you can barely listen to people to understand where the conversation is going, not able to tell what you think about the topics.
It was like a watching ping-pong game at the beginning...looking at the people speaking one after another, quietly.
All the girls in the dorm were between 18 to 20 some years old, and they speak fast. You also do not know what they are talking about if you never watched the particular TV programme or movie which is the topic of the conversation.
But I found the tool to break ice.
There was a piano in the dorm living room.
Besides the piano lessons I was taking when I was in kindergarten, I self-studies some music on piano. So that I played simple ones like Richard Clayderman and For Elise.
That music I played created something to talk about, and it worked as a real ice-breaker.
There were variety of students in the dorm: My roommate was from Hawaii, others from NY, Alaska, and Paris. Some blacks, some whites, and one Asian (me)...as the time went by, we became good friends.
Another music I enjoyed was a College Choir.
When I took a Voice Class to fulfill the liberal arts requirements, the pianist of the class recommended me to take the Concert Choir class which had one hour lesson every day.
It was over 60 students in the choir with full 8 voice parts. I became the second soprano and only foreign student in the choir.
It was such a wonderful experience. The choir sang very classic gospels in Latin, German, and English, or sometimes the medley of Beauty and the Beast. We went to the concerts in the churches around the cities in California like Santa Barbara.
When you are lonely, it was always the music which helped me and stood by me.
There was one concert away from Bakersfield. The audiences were mostly elder people in that city who loved classic choir music. After we finished all the music of the day, one old lady approached me and said,
"I watched you perform very beautifully. It was so wonderful."
There was no solo part and I was one of the many sopranos, so I wondered what impressed that lady so much, but I was very grateful and thanked her for the comment. Being the only foreigner in the choir was actually not so easy. But that lady's comment saved my day and my entire year in the choir.
Music helped me to communicate people better, and it also supported me to gather myself during the tough moment.
Without piano and singing, I would have made much fewer friends during the first year in Bakersfield. I believe in the power of music, and I do appreciate it very very much.
But at that time, I didn't dream that I would be working in a music company one day.
It was not an easy experience to get to know people in the college dorm while you can barely listen to people to understand where the conversation is going, not able to tell what you think about the topics.
It was like a watching ping-pong game at the beginning...looking at the people speaking one after another, quietly.
All the girls in the dorm were between 18 to 20 some years old, and they speak fast. You also do not know what they are talking about if you never watched the particular TV programme or movie which is the topic of the conversation.
But I found the tool to break ice.
There was a piano in the dorm living room.
Besides the piano lessons I was taking when I was in kindergarten, I self-studies some music on piano. So that I played simple ones like Richard Clayderman and For Elise.
That music I played created something to talk about, and it worked as a real ice-breaker.
There were variety of students in the dorm: My roommate was from Hawaii, others from NY, Alaska, and Paris. Some blacks, some whites, and one Asian (me)...as the time went by, we became good friends.
Another music I enjoyed was a College Choir.
When I took a Voice Class to fulfill the liberal arts requirements, the pianist of the class recommended me to take the Concert Choir class which had one hour lesson every day.
It was over 60 students in the choir with full 8 voice parts. I became the second soprano and only foreign student in the choir.
It was such a wonderful experience. The choir sang very classic gospels in Latin, German, and English, or sometimes the medley of Beauty and the Beast. We went to the concerts in the churches around the cities in California like Santa Barbara.
When you are lonely, it was always the music which helped me and stood by me.
There was one concert away from Bakersfield. The audiences were mostly elder people in that city who loved classic choir music. After we finished all the music of the day, one old lady approached me and said,
"I watched you perform very beautifully. It was so wonderful."
There was no solo part and I was one of the many sopranos, so I wondered what impressed that lady so much, but I was very grateful and thanked her for the comment. Being the only foreigner in the choir was actually not so easy. But that lady's comment saved my day and my entire year in the choir.
Music helped me to communicate people better, and it also supported me to gather myself during the tough moment.
Without piano and singing, I would have made much fewer friends during the first year in Bakersfield. I believe in the power of music, and I do appreciate it very very much.
But at that time, I didn't dream that I would be working in a music company one day.
Thursday, 3 April 2008
From Tokyo to Bakersfield
You normally do not think your hometown is a funny place.
Where you were born is all you know until you move out one day, and you normally love your hometown.
For some reason, I didn't.
Not that I hated Tokyo, but I was never comfortable. I didn't quite fit in.
My friends constantly told me I was a bit strange, or different. As I was just being myself, I didn't know how I was strange or different, but that's what they told me.
There are number of desirable attributes for a desirable young girl there. Dressing in a certain way, making a hair style in a certain way, taking about the TV program in a certain way, and being modest and shy in a certain way, speaking to boys in a certain way, etc.
I thought they were all non-sense and ignored most of them. That seemed have made me a "different" girl who was never popular among boys in school.
So it was such a relief when I went to Bakersfield, California to attend Bakersfield College there and lived in the dorm, and the new friends in the girls dorm told me I was not strange at all.
To be "different" in US, you have to be acutely different from the crowd, not just ignoring the desirable attributes.
It is such an irony that I am a pure Japanese with a typical Japanese look, and yet I was a strange girl in Japan and not in US. At that time my English was much poorer, but still I was not considered "different".
That was the first time ever in my life not being "strange". I thought I finally found a place I can be just myself. I loved my friends in Bakersfield, and I loved my teachers who were all great.
Many years after living outside Japan, I discovered Tokyo was rather a funny place and a bit strange. My other friends who visited Tokyo for the first time tend to have a similar impression. No wonder I was called "strange" at that time.
The study itself was tough. With limited reading and writing English skills, attending normal college classes was a real challenge. It took me two hours to read a page of psychology book which I had to read 20 pages a week.
So I spent all my waking time to read textbooks of all the classes I took. If I do not read them in advance, I could not understand what the professors were saying in the class. My hearing skill was not so good, and the teachers were from all over the US and each had a different accent.
Until I finish high school in Japan, I never really studied. I was a stupid young girl who thought not studying was cool. Somehow I managed above the average scores without studying much, so I continued not studying except for the few days before the term exams.
But now, if I don't study every waking minute, I could not catch up. So all I did was reading, reading, and reading even when my friends were out having fun over the weekends.
Because I finally learned how to study, I start doing very well. In the first term, I got A in every class.
I remember very touching moment with Dr. Whitehouse who was a professor of Introduction of Psychology.
He announced that the last exam and essay paper were required only for those score was not confirmed by the previous exams. Then he announced the students' name who already earned A and said they do not have to take the last exam. My name was in it.
But I was going to major in Psychology and liked his class, so I prepared the paper and came to take the exam well prepared.
Dr. Whitehouse realised that I was there, and he handed me the exam paper and said "Thank you" to me personally.
There were no teachers who ever thanked me for taking an exam. That was one glorious moment in Bakersfield.
Where you were born is all you know until you move out one day, and you normally love your hometown.
For some reason, I didn't.
Not that I hated Tokyo, but I was never comfortable. I didn't quite fit in.
My friends constantly told me I was a bit strange, or different. As I was just being myself, I didn't know how I was strange or different, but that's what they told me.
There are number of desirable attributes for a desirable young girl there. Dressing in a certain way, making a hair style in a certain way, taking about the TV program in a certain way, and being modest and shy in a certain way, speaking to boys in a certain way, etc.
I thought they were all non-sense and ignored most of them. That seemed have made me a "different" girl who was never popular among boys in school.
So it was such a relief when I went to Bakersfield, California to attend Bakersfield College there and lived in the dorm, and the new friends in the girls dorm told me I was not strange at all.
To be "different" in US, you have to be acutely different from the crowd, not just ignoring the desirable attributes.
It is such an irony that I am a pure Japanese with a typical Japanese look, and yet I was a strange girl in Japan and not in US. At that time my English was much poorer, but still I was not considered "different".
That was the first time ever in my life not being "strange". I thought I finally found a place I can be just myself. I loved my friends in Bakersfield, and I loved my teachers who were all great.
Many years after living outside Japan, I discovered Tokyo was rather a funny place and a bit strange. My other friends who visited Tokyo for the first time tend to have a similar impression. No wonder I was called "strange" at that time.
The study itself was tough. With limited reading and writing English skills, attending normal college classes was a real challenge. It took me two hours to read a page of psychology book which I had to read 20 pages a week.
So I spent all my waking time to read textbooks of all the classes I took. If I do not read them in advance, I could not understand what the professors were saying in the class. My hearing skill was not so good, and the teachers were from all over the US and each had a different accent.
Until I finish high school in Japan, I never really studied. I was a stupid young girl who thought not studying was cool. Somehow I managed above the average scores without studying much, so I continued not studying except for the few days before the term exams.
But now, if I don't study every waking minute, I could not catch up. So all I did was reading, reading, and reading even when my friends were out having fun over the weekends.
Because I finally learned how to study, I start doing very well. In the first term, I got A in every class.
I remember very touching moment with Dr. Whitehouse who was a professor of Introduction of Psychology.
He announced that the last exam and essay paper were required only for those score was not confirmed by the previous exams. Then he announced the students' name who already earned A and said they do not have to take the last exam. My name was in it.
But I was going to major in Psychology and liked his class, so I prepared the paper and came to take the exam well prepared.
Dr. Whitehouse realised that I was there, and he handed me the exam paper and said "Thank you" to me personally.
There were no teachers who ever thanked me for taking an exam. That was one glorious moment in Bakersfield.
Wednesday, 2 April 2008
First Day: Why Black Sheep
As my other blog is in Japanese and it can be only viewed by those in the Japanese SNS, I thought of writing another one here.
I decided the title of the blog because my uncle once told me I was a black sheep in the family when I told him I wanted to US to study. At that time, I was living in Tokyo where I was born and raised.
He already lived in US for more than 20 years and used to tell me to come over once I became big enough, but both my mother and uncle (I have no father since I was two years old) both opposed the idea. They thought living in US alone is not safe, and that would create a financial burden to my mother.
But I really had to go. Something told me I had to.
To cut the story short, with my deserted father's temporary financial support, I managed to go to the college in California when I was 20 years old.
After I studied and lived in US for three years, my financial situation forced me out of US and I moved to Malaysia. From 1994 to 2006, I lived and worked in Malaysia where I got married and delivered a baby who is now four years old.
But being called a Black Sheep really stuck with me for a long time. I studied and worked hard to prove him wrong. My barely-know-each-other-father also once told me that I could be a secretary or something if I learn a bit of English in US. Yeah, right. A secretary. I have nothing against secretaries, but I knew they were all wrong and I had to prove that.
So I would like to look back what I have done ever since and what I am going to do in near future. I would be happy if anyone happened to read this, whoever and wherever you are.
I decided the title of the blog because my uncle once told me I was a black sheep in the family when I told him I wanted to US to study. At that time, I was living in Tokyo where I was born and raised.
He already lived in US for more than 20 years and used to tell me to come over once I became big enough, but both my mother and uncle (I have no father since I was two years old) both opposed the idea. They thought living in US alone is not safe, and that would create a financial burden to my mother.
But I really had to go. Something told me I had to.
To cut the story short, with my deserted father's temporary financial support, I managed to go to the college in California when I was 20 years old.
After I studied and lived in US for three years, my financial situation forced me out of US and I moved to Malaysia. From 1994 to 2006, I lived and worked in Malaysia where I got married and delivered a baby who is now four years old.
But being called a Black Sheep really stuck with me for a long time. I studied and worked hard to prove him wrong. My barely-know-each-other-father also once told me that I could be a secretary or something if I learn a bit of English in US. Yeah, right. A secretary. I have nothing against secretaries, but I knew they were all wrong and I had to prove that.
So I would like to look back what I have done ever since and what I am going to do in near future. I would be happy if anyone happened to read this, whoever and wherever you are.
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